Hitman Chev Chelios is kidnapped by a mysterious Chinese mobster. Three months later, he wakes up to discover his nearly indestructible heart has been surgically removed and replaced with a battery-operated ticker that requires regular jolts of electricity in order to work.

This is going to be in theaters? Really? You don’t say? Wow, how far have we sunk when a movie this bad is honestly going to be released in theaters?

Opening weekend gross —- 8 dollars!